Along with the fun of the holidays comes the excitement of a new year. With a new year comes new goals, a clean start, and many things to look forward to! A large part of looking ahead at the future is reflecting on the past. Often this is done in a negative light; we focus on the things we didn’t do well or negative aspects of the previous year. This is good in the sense that we need to be aware of the things we struggle with or need to improve upon. However, when January 1st rolls around, I think we are a bit too harsh on ourselves!
A little at a time:
The most important part of making goals isn’t the end-result, it is the trying, the testing and the struggling to get there that has a lasting impression on us and affects us the most in the long run! Big and grand results don’t happen too often, yet we place a lot of pressure on ourselves to have some type of fabulous outcome! Piece-by-piece and day-by-day, we can evolve into the person we truly desire to be, but it is unfair to expect an immediate change. My most dominant New Year’s resolution is to be more present with my kids. This will require putting down my phone more, spend less time watching television, be more engaged while spending time with them, and try to enjoy more fully this time as a stay-at-home mom to young children. Does this mean that by the end of February I’ll have everything figured out and be the most perfect present mom? Absolutely not! It’s going to take time to change my ways, break poor habits, and evolve into a new way of doing things. And that is okay!
Focus on the positive:
A new favorite movie of ours is "Finding Dory" and from that, I’ve adapted a new saying into my life: What would Dory do?
She is always positive and always finds a way. In thinking ahead at our new goals, lets look for the positive! Something as simple as “I only ate 9 M&Ms today instead of 10” can make a huge difference in the way our mind thinks. This can soften how harsh we are to ourselves sometimes. Another New Year’s resolution of mine is to have more patience. My little boy just turned two, and I swear there was a switch flipped somewhere that sent him straight into the terrible twos. And from the looks of it, these terrible twos are not going anywhere anytime soon… This has required me to attain a heck of a lot more patience out of thin air. At the end of the day, when he’s asleep in his bed, and I’m reflecting on the day and planning for tomorrow, I struggle with guilt at certain situations that arose earlier and how I reacted to them. Along with a desire to be a more patient mother, I hope to become more positive and forgiving towards my attempts at getting there!
Write your goals down:
Making goals is one thing, but if you don't remember them each day, how will you remember what to work on? So put them somewhere you'll see them often, like a magnet board
or white board, to help remind you and motivate you.
I’m not sure if it’s reassuring or 100% crushing that not one single person has parenting figured out completely. This means that there’s always room for improvement and that we’ll forever be learning! And there's no better way to do this than one step at a time, making and achieving goals, and doing the very best we can. Happy New Year and good luck with your New Year’s Resolutions!