How to Dad: Being a Better Husband Makes You a Better Dad
Did you know that being a good husband also makes you a better dad? On the surface, these two items seem completely different. However, if you dig a little bit deeper, you’ll see that they are connected.
Valentine’s Day has come and gone in a flash, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t continue those same romantic gestures all of the time. In my experience, I have noticed that when I do those romantic gestures more often, our whole family life improves. My wife feels better connected to me, the love we have for each other grows, and that love ends up spilling over to our children. Here are a few helpful tips for scoring points as a husband:
Random Acts of Flowers
My wife pretends like she doesn’t like flowers all that much. She tells me all the time that they are a waste of money because they end up dying. However, she never seems to be in a bad mood when I show up with a few yellow roses (her favorite) because it shows that I was thinking of her. Whenever I come home with the flowers, she usually asks me if I lost my job or if something serious has happened. Sure, I lost my job once and brought home flowers to break the ice, but that was one time. I really just buy them because I am thinking of her and I want her to feel like someone has her back when parenting becomes chaotic.
Random Acts of Cleaning
As you can imagine, having two children under the age of three can be a lot of work. Toys can be easily thrown about the floor (especially with our eight-month-old son who is learning how to throw) and someone has to clean that up. My wife is currently going to school to fulfill a lifelong dream of becoming a nurse, while being a full-time mom. Obviously, when she has to satisfy the needs of her kids, her own needs, and any schoolwork she needs to do, she can get stressed out. Fortunately she does night classes, so that gives me a chance to sharpen my dad and husband skills while she is at school. I like to help get a few things done that she just didn’t have the time to do. Whether it be picking up the toys, doing a load of laundry or cleaning the dishes, I like to knock out an item or two on her list. When she walks in, she is all smiles, reminding me that it was totally worth it.
A Night on the Town
I love my children with all my heart, might, mind and soul. However, there are still a few instances where I need a little time away that doesn’t involve me working. My wife feels the same way, so we have made it a goal to get out at least once a month on a date. This last weekend was the first time in a long time that we had gone out just the two of us. We didn’t do anything fancy (we went to a recently opened comedy club), but the most important thing is that we were together. Sure, my thoughts went to straight to wondering how my boys were doing from time-to-time (I’m not a monster), but it felt good just to be with my wife. After talking with her after our date, we both felt recharged and ready to be better parents than ever before.
How can being a better husband make me a better father?
By striving to be a better husband and father, I am setting a wonderful example for my boys. My dad has always been my hero and I want to be just like him. I hope my boys strive to follow my good example as well. Additionally, when I help with laundry, picking up toys and other seemingly fruitless tasks, my patience grows. I also have more patience for my children, in turn making me a better father.
Sure, it’s a long process, but feeling the love my family gains from each little task makes all the difference.