As women, I think it’s fairly safe to say that we’re not the easiest on ourselves. We juggle the ins and outs of running a family. We have a desire to look and do our best in everything we’re doing. Often there's an immense fear of failure looming over us. How can we find a way to look past our many imperfections and learn to just love ourselves?
Recently my husband and I escaped to the mountains for a short day of skiing. Upon pulling into the parking lot we saw some friends we hadn’t seen in a few months. Immediately, the wife started telling me about how her snow pants were so tight and how she’s put on all this weight over the past few months. I sat there listening, thinking she had absolutely lost her mind, and wondering why, of all the things we could talk about, it was this. She is a beautiful, healthy woman, and even if she weren’t in layers of warm snow clothes, nobody would ever assume she was carrying extra weight.
I was straight-up flabbergasted! Why did this friend of mine feel such a need to bring up all her insecurities? Was it to make herself feel better? Justification? Shame? These are all things I pondered for the rest of that morning. I realized that it was not only this particular friend who talks this way about herself, I think this is a commonality among most women, myself included. We are just hard on ourselves.
So how can we find ways to love ourselves more and treat ourselves with the respect we deserve? I am not exactly qualified to answer this extremely deep question, and I don’t think there’s one specific answer, but I can certainly empathize quite a bit. I have some experience in the field of self-doubt and insecurities. Womanhood is a tough journey -- an ever-evolving experience that requires faith, belief in a greater purpose, and mercy. Heck, to put it bluntly, some days plain just suck.
The Power of Positivity
In my relatively average amount of years being a grown-up, the number one attribute that has affected my perspective on life is positivity. Now I’m not saying go around pretending the world is all rainbows and chocolate chip cookie dough. I’m saying that looking at things with a “glass-half-full” mentality will go a lot further than fuming at the glass that someone used and left sitting out for you to put away. Positivity is not something that comes easily to everyone, and it takes practice. Being aware of your thoughts and where they are coming from will help you respond sensibly in frustrating or emotional situations, and it will make it easier to be more lenient with yourself, your mistakes, and shortcomings. All that will lead to greater self-love.