Here's a post for all of the SAHMs who are trying to make sure they don't lose themselves in the 24/7 baby talk and predominately veggie straw diet. Yes, being at home with our little loves is an absolute privilege, but it is also a sacrifice in a lot of ways. One thing that many of us struggle with is knowing how to find friends who are also at home watching Disney Jr. with their babes on the weekdays. As a mom, it can sometimes feel intimidating and awkward to expand our social circle, but when we break down those embarrassment barriers we can have a lot of fun getting back in the friend zone!
Be Open and ApproachableWe are all familiar with the dreaded small talk. It is natural to feel scared or anxious when you're looking for new friends, and as a STAHM we can probably come up with a hundred other things to do after looking after the babes all day (or maybe just napping). But once you have a kid you really do know how it feels to be on the inside looking out. The most important thing to remember is that you're not the only mama out there looking for new friends, and if you're open and approachable you'll be sure to get some. Don't be afraid of the rejection if another mamas not interested in meeting up again; just roll with the punches, and keep trying. One of the greatest thing about being a mama is our kids will do 90% of the work for us! Let that be a great way to open up conversation when you're at the park, or at the library reading circle with some other mamas.
Your Kids Can HelpHere's some advice to live by: Use your kids. We already do it to get out of social gatherings that we're trying to avoid, why wouldn't we use them to get invited to them? When you've got a little cutie who's getting along great with another babe when you're at the splash pad, spark up a conversation with their mama and test the waters. If you feel the friendship sparks, bring up how great your kids are playing together and how you're trying to make sure they start making some more friends (wink wink). That way you're making it easy for the other mama to accept the offer without too much commitment with something like, "Yeah we come here every Friday after lunch!" Tada! The beginning of a beautiful friendship my loves.
Meet Your NeighborsOne thing that many mamas take for granted is our neighbors. Remember when you were looking for that new place, and you couldn't shut up about how great this place is for new families? Well start to take advantage of all those families! If you've bumped into some other mamas while playing outside, or on your morning walk with babe, then extend the invite to have them over for a play date. We all know how great it is to have besties close by, so why shouldn't we try and make some friends with our neighbors? Give it a try, and you'll be surprised by the results!
When you've got a hiatus of your own play dates don't be afraid to start your own! Let your baby daddy know that you're taking a night out with your other mamas to go out to eat, see a movie, or even do a class together at the gym! You can take the initiative to start a fun group with other mamas, and it will make it so much more fun once you get together with the kids! When you're taking the reigns of the group, remember that mamas aren't looking for anything special. If your plan for the week is to head to the duck pond other mamas will show up just to make sure they get some Vitamin D and a little girl talk for the day. You've got the power to make your own relationships, so don't sit back and feel defeated!
Try your best to step out of your comfort zone (aka your front door) and find some other mamas to make your days a little bit brighter! Let's be kind to each other, be open to making some new friends, and be grateful that our babes are bringing us together. XO Mamas