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SAHM: Moms and Bad Attitudes

SAHM: Moms and Bad Attitudes

Why is it that moms are expected to set the tone of the house and lead by example, and so much pressure is placed on mothers to be happy all the time because “when Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”? Don’t people realize how many hormones we’re dealing with? And the lack of sleep that is really truly never ending? And the pressure to be perfect bombarding us from every direction? And the self-doubt and mom guilt that festers day after day until eventually there are days that it all comes crashing down and every single person in the house is affected by it?

Why do we have such an overwhelming amount of responsibility to achieve a “happy wife, happy life” status? Truly there is already enough on our plates without the pressure of everybody else’s day at our mercy. When our hormonal days are especially extensive, we don’t have the freedom of basking in self-pity like we could when we were teenagers, because we have children and a spouse and a household to run. So how are we supposed to master our emotions?

We don’t wake up one day and say to ourselves, “Self, today we’re going to be incredibly grumpy for no reason at all and ruin everybody else’s day in the process”. Yet, a lot of the time, nothing specific or ginormous needs to happen in order for bad moods to settle in either. It’s not preplanned; it’s not always triggered by something that “makes sense” but it’s also something that we can’t really get away from. Not entirely.

I know everybody has his/her own prediction or fantasy or belief of life after death. And my own assumption of this time and place is that it’ll provide a heck of a lot of clarity. Stuff will start making a lot more sense. I’ll know why I had to go through various trials both large and small, and I’ll understand more fully different life lessons I’ll have learned. But, by darn, if this question about why moms (of all people!) are plagued with nasty hormones isn’t one of the first ones I get answered when I reach the other side, I’m going to be really upset.

Of course, until that time when I’ll hopefully get some answers, I only have one thing I can do. Keep trying my best. And my best involves a lot of things! I think the most important thing of all I can do--on days like today when so much emotion and frustration not only creep in, but start to take over--is to remember that today is only one day. And to keep in mind that the good outweighs the bad exponentially. Because if I can’t switch my mindset to remember the positive, there is undoubtedly more negative ready to pounce and keep me down for as long as possible.

No, it isn’t fair. And yes, I consider it to be a large life trial. But I suppose that as I keep fighting it (yes, it’s truly a battle some days), and the stronger I come out each time I do fight…well, that’s what’s going to keep me going. Mini victories and positive thinking just might be the two most important things I’ve gleaned from this “big question” of mine. And I like to think that the love I have for my family is undoubtedly more influential than my bad-attitude days anyway.

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