My 18-month-old twins have quickly turned from babies to growing toddlers. I'm amazed at the things they do now, and am always wondering, "where have my babies gone??" My oldest is 3 years old, and I can only imagine how much her sisters will be like her when they get to her age. I especially wonder what I'm going to do when there are TWO 3-year-olds trying to reason with me while throwing a tantrum. TWO of them? Even better, what happens when they are about to turn five and head off to school?
To answer these questions, we asked some twin mamas who have been there, done that. How will life look with a 4-year-old? No, no. How will life look with TWO 4-year-olds??
We all know that naps can be a sanity saver in between taking care of several small children all. day. long. It can be a little you time, a time to just sit down and do literally NOTHING. So what happens when your twins outgrow their naps, but aren't in school yet?
Twin mama Sara Brandon told us that she still utilizes the same "nap" routine and gives them "quiet time" instead. She said, "They can watch a movie on the tablet or play quietly...but they can't come out until quiet time is over. Some days they would fall asleep and others they would just play, but it was my chance to have lunch in peace and recharge my batteries."
So keep up those "naps" mama! Take that time to yourself! Give your kid a few toys and let them play while you take a little break. You can even make it a time for learning; hand them the Kid O A to Z Upper Case Magnatab, and start prepping them for elementary school---because it's right around the corner mama!
Twins or Individuals?
Up to this point, they've probably been known as "the twins" or "the girls" or "the boys," not always just by their name. I find myself always saying, "Bree and the twins" instead of "Bree, Colette and Delilah." Right? But once they are 4, they are going to head to school soon, and could potentially be in different classes, they could have different friends, they could actually be more separate beings than they ever have been! And how weird of a change is that!?
They have always been "the twins" so how do you separate them as two individuals? "They have very different personalities," said twin mama Kimberly Loper. "They have different interests, different favorite things, different hobbies.
This affected us the most when we celebrated their last birthday. We did two separate parties so that they could each feel special and have their own theme for their parties. Since then, we have also separated them into separate bedrooms so that they could decorate their rooms in their own special ways."
Obviously giving each twin their own room may not work for your family, but giving them a special place to decorate as theirs, or have something of their very own (something they don't share with their twin), might be very important at this stage. Also, they will probably start to have their own friends and they may not share them. Especially if they end up in different classes in school, they may not even know the same people.
So what happens when one twin is invited to a party, but the other one isn't? Twin mama Rachel Hall said that you should let the one twin go to the party on their own, without their twin. She adds, "I think it's healthy to have their own friends and their own life outside of being a twin."
Being a Big Kid but Not Really
At this age, they think they are big kids, but they aren't quite there yet. "I think this age is extremely difficult because they feel like they are "big kids," but they still can't go to school, or walk to their friend's house by themselves, or make their own snacks," said Loper. Especially if you have older kids, this may be the time to find something they can do to make them feel more like a "big kid."
Give them a little more responsibility for something; have them help out more with chores, or help dad or mom do more adult chores. For instance, if dad has to take out his tools to work on the car, fix a broken door, etc., make a point to bring out toys like the Plan Toys Tool Belt and have them "help" dad out.
So hug those toddlers tight, enjoy playing with them now, because one day... you'll have two teenagers on your hands... and THEN WHAT?!
*The “Two to Kiss, Two to Love” series is a helpful series for all you twin mamas out there! If you have a twin related question, comment below, and I’ll answer it for you!*